Frequently Asked Questions.

Are these really frequently asked, liar?: Of course not. As with 99% of FAQs on the Internets, it's just a bunch of stuff I wish people would inquire about, so as to show my witty repartie.
Hey, I know you! And I know you're a French-Canadian who speaks french, you Frenchie! Why the english website, traitor?: Well, since it worked for Celine …
What's with the website name anyway?: It represents a vision of the soul as a character in the artistic process, and it's … ah, what's the use: it's just because www.thebestpageintheuniverse.com was already taken.
Seriously, your stuff rocks. I want to pay you ridiculous amounts of money for a copy of your artwork. Where do I send the check?: Just email me by using the link in the footer. My people will be in touch with your people.
Hey sexy! You've melted my heart and ruined my panties — how can I get in line to be touched by Greatness?: First things first: send me a pic (clothed is OK too) and I'll think about it.
Hello scumbag. You used one of my photos without asking. Where should the lawsuit be served?: Right here: totally_my_real_email@i-didnt-make-this-up-i-swear.com. Nah, seriously, I'm sorry if I violated any intellectual property; it wasn't on purpose. Email me and I'll pull the stuff immediately.
Hey retard! Don't you know that PHP is, like, so last year? Why don't you get with the program and use .Net / Ruby / Java etc.?: Thanks for you advice, mister.